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Snippets - 11/11/2008

Nov 11 2008 10:04
Ashley Brown
A sign-ifcantly challenged non-column; Car Park Closed (or is it?); Private Events; Pedestrian Safety; The Right Stuff.
Live! wonders what private events have been taking place in the "Male washroom"

If there's one thing College can be counted on to do, it's producing bizarre or unhelpful signs. In a significantly challenged snippets, Live! takes a look at some classic examples.

Car Park Open Closed

While preparing this for publication, it also became clear that the clock is an hour out...

The Exhibition Road entrance to Imperial's car park has once again shown that this bastion of cutting-edge Science and Technology (and apparently some Medicine too, when the doctors aren't poisoning their girlfriends) is incapable of using said science and technology.

Before the start of term the Exhibition Road entrance to Imperial's car park received a shiny new electronic sign, used to display the date, time, a message and whether the car park was open or closed. Branding mishaps aside, this looked like a good way of ensuring those manning the gatehouse never had to go outside to stick their 20th century 'Car Park Open' sign into the middle of the street. However, for the past month people using the entrance have been forced to take their chances, as while the electronic sign proudly displayed 'Car Park Closed', the old A-frame sign stuck in the middle of the road proclaimed 'Car Park Open'. But which one was right?

All was finally revealed this morning, as the offending part of the electronic sign was changed .... by sticking black tape over it. This reporter will happily take some of the money car parking has to throw away on useless technology.

Private Events


The College drive to bring new and exciting external events onto campus appears to know no bounds, as members of the motor clubs found out at the start of the month. Those taking a trip into Mechanical Engineering at five-thirty in the morning to use the men's toilets found them to be closed - for a private event.

Live! is all for expanding the range of events used to bring in money for the College, but perhaps this was a little too far...


Pedestrian Safety

You're much safer to the right of the barriers, clearly!

Due to the large amount of traffic around the back of Sherfield, College has installed temporary speed bumps and a helpful barrier to separate pedestrian traffic from delivery lorries, cars, old fire engines etc. As can be seen, there's a sign up reminding pedestrians to use 'this' route - helpfully erected above a bollard blocking access to the pedestrian side of the barrier. The barrier of course is also no use, as having been hit by a number of vehicles there's no room for pedestrians on that side of it. A previous barrier, made of wood, was also reduced to splinters having been the victim of a vicious ram-raid attack by a lorry. Current score: lorries 2, Pedestrian safety barriers nil.

Perhaps if they filled the red and white bollards with water they would be more effective?

The Right Stuff

A good explanation and an end date, on a sign! (Click to Enlarge)

Of course sometimes College do get it right. After several years of protests against the Queen's Lawn disappearing without trace for months on end (which also annoyed the previous Rector!), this time they put up helpful signs explaining why a marquee was on the lawn and how long it would be there for.

Well done to whoever thought of this. Don't think you'll get away with a similar sign if a marquee is due to be up for six months though...

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Discussion about “Snippets - 11/11/2008”

The comments below are unmoderated submissions by Live! readers. The Editor accepts no liability for their content, nor for any offence caused by them. Any complaints should be directed to the Editor.
1. JJ   
Nov 11 2008 17:06

Anyone seen the signs in the library when you top up your account?

"Please print safely..."

2. Ant   
Nov 12 2008 20:40

I'm disappointed that no members of the motor club decided to at least under take some pedantry and correct the sign into correct english.

Nov 17 2008 14:16

This article went up on Tuesday. By Friday morning, the clock was saying the right time.

Has anyone noticed if they've managed to get it to say "Car Park Open" yet?

Nov 17 2008 15:06

No. But they did remove the black tape when the car park was in fact closed...

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