It was the week before Christmas and all through the house, nothing was stirring not even a mouse; that is to say nothing but the elite group of mascot raiders known only as ?The Wooden Horse?, who decided that it wasn?t fair Davy should be locked up in a dark dingy cupboard somewhere in College at Christmas time, so decided to give him a tour of London instead.
Davy began his tour by paying his respects to Diana before moving on to see the Duke of Wellington. It must be said that after being woken at 7am Davy wasn?t in the best of "touristy" moods, especially as it was biting cold that morning at 3 degrees. Still after a grumpy start and a few whinges from the silly miner we wrapped him up warm in a C&G scarf and he soon got into the swing of things.
Davy was overwhelmed by the number of tourists on the steps of the palace so he kept his distance and waved at the queen from afar. I?m sorry to report that the man from British Airways refused ?Sir Humphrey? boarding privileges to the London Eye so Davy was forced to view Parliament from the ground. As Big Ben chimed out his hourly jingle, Davy gazed longingly down the river towards a fine looking Castle; The Tower of London was a brief stop off for Davy, time was of the essence and he couldn?t stay for a guided tour. So he pressed on further through London, down the Fleet Street and up towards St Paul's Cathedral. The sheer size of the architecture made poor Davy feel very insignificant and he nearly broke down in tears.
Well it was getting near sunset and Davy was needing his beauty sleep, but he insisted on taking a scenic route home, stopping off to feed the birds on the Serpentine where he got into a deep conversation about the rights and welfare of canaries. There was only one more stop before returning to his grimy cupboard of sin; Davy wanted to make a phone call from a traditional British phone box, a desperate plea to the RSM for redemption, a ransom call demanding £300 be raised for RAG in his name, for his safe return to the Miners of Imperial College.
Earlier this week, The Wooden Horse returned Theta to the RCS after the ransom was paid by one sporting individual who, for the purposes of this article, would like to remain anonymous. Well done RCS, the train is now in motion. The question that remains is: Will the RSM hop on board? Or will Davy stay buried under the Queens lawn for a very long time to come?